Re: [glob2-devel] Globulation 2 FOSDEM presentation : draft of complete presentation

[Kai Antweiler]

>  I appreciate any feedback you might give. I do not promise that I will follow
>  every suggestion but I will consider them.

Page 2:
Not all developers are listed in the AUTHORS file, some are not.
You can skip the "all", but this is a very minor issue.

Page 7:
build
repair
fill
feed
heal
upgrade

This isn't well structured:
"build" and "upgrade" belong to units as well as to buildungs.
So why do you separte "repair" and "heal"?
Write "heal/repair" instead.

Page 8:
Game
manages units, which
   move randomly
   place buildings randomly
   build buildings randomly
   find resources randomly
   go to resources using
   pheromones

Better write:
Game
manages units randomly, which
place buildings  (do they?)
construct buildings
find resources (really?)
move randomly - unless they go for resources using pheromones


Page 9:
A good place to emphasize the importance of graphic designers for game
development ;)


Page 10:
"cross-plateform"
It is "cross-platform" - without 'e'

"Units still have their own lives, but the player has a broader range
of actions."

I'd prefer: "Although units retain/(still have) their own lives,
the player has a wider range of actions now"

...
"upgrades/repairs"
If you put "upgrade/repair" together here, you should think about
doing this also on page 7.

"sets the number of workers"
Better "sets the number of units" - think of war/exploration flags.


"The resulting gameplay is innovative, and displays promising
directions of extension."

I always prefer three points in enumerations:
"The rusulting gameplay is innovative, highly extensible and fun."
or:
"The rusulting gameplay is innovative, efficient and highly extensible."


Swap pages 10 and 11. The People will have a better impression of
glob2 after seeing this picture. In the current order, everyone will
have the old graphics in mind, when you tell them about the big
improvements from glob1->glob2.
The human mind is not logical, it is psychological!
Put the image first and right after the glob1 image. You can't give a better
impression of improvement, no matter how well you talk.

I'd like to see one of leo's clouds and an explorer on the picture.


Page 13:
Why do you have "boost" twice?

Page 20:
We have other gradient-types too: resource, forbidden-zone-exiting, ...

Page 21ff:
We have multiple gradient-construction algorithms.

Page 28:
"graphisms" Is that a real word?

Also:
coding, composing music, testing, ... - as on our homepage


"The Globulation 2 community needs you!"
Picture of uncle sam, please!
http://www.wickedsunshine.com/WagePeace/Rights/Images/WickedSunshine_UncleSam_Blank_800x1000.png
http://trouble.philadelphiaweekly.com/archives/want%20you.jpg

If you need to reduce size, reduce the quality of the ant-picture.

Page 30:
"artists are worst": Sounds bad. write: "especially artists"

Page 32:
"In the future"
3D graphics.



>  The presentation itself is currently not open source nor freely to distribute
>  as I would prevent its current spread. In the future, would you want it in
>  the mercurial repository along its sources?

Nice idea!
So in upcoming talks by other glob2-devs your work could be reused
easily. I don't think that this is realistic, but theoretical this
makes sense.
But I'd prefer an extra repository. Most of our users/developers won't
use it. If you don't want an extra repository on your server, you
could use a public server - there are a few now. I haven't checked
their policies, but at least launchpad.net should work - though
laurchpad uses bzr instead of hg.
-- 
Kai Antweiler