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www/fun/jokes fundefinitions
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From: |
Ineiev |
|
Subject: |
www/fun/jokes fundefinitions |
|
Date: |
Fri, 29 Jan 2021 12:14:17 -0500 (EST) |
CVSROOT: /web/www
Module name: www
Changes by: Ineiev <ineiev> 21/01/29 12:14:17
Removed files:
fun/jokes : fundefinitions
Log message:
Remove stray file.
CVSWeb URLs:
http://web.cvs.savannah.gnu.org/viewcvs/www/fun/jokes/fundefinitions?cvsroot=www&r1=1.1&r2=0
Patches:
Index: fundefinitions
===================================================================
RCS file: fundefinitions
diff -N fundefinitions
--- fundefinitions 19 May 2010 02:57:04 -0000 1.1
+++ /dev/null 1 Jan 1970 00:00:00 -0000
@@ -1,469 +0,0 @@
-RT#572876
-
-------=_NextPart_000_0011_01CAEB0F.13010070
-Content-Type: text/plain;
-> charset="us-ascii"
-Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit
-
-1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
-
-2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has
-gained.
-
-3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
-
-4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.
-
-5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
-
-6. Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a
-nightgown.
-
-7. Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp.
-
-8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.
-
-9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run
-over by a steamroller.
-
-10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
-
-11. Testicle, n.. A humorous question on an exam.
-
-12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
-
-13. Pokemon, n.. A Rastafarian proctologist.
-
-14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
-
-15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up
-onto the roof and gets stuck there.
-
-16. Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish
-men.
-
-
-
-
-
-
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-
-<div class=3DSection1>
-
-<p class=3DMsoNormal><span =
-style=3D'font-size:18.0pt;color:black'>1.<b><u> Coffee</u></b>,
-n. The person upon whom one coughs.<br>
-<br>
-2.<b><u> Flabbergasted</u></b>, adj. Appalled by discovering how much =
-weight
-one has gained.<br>
-<br>
-3.<b><u> Abdicate</u></b>, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat
-stomach.<br>
-<br>
-4.<b><u> Esplanade</u></b>, v. To attempt an explanation while =
-drunk.<br>
-<br>
-5.<b><u> Willy-nilly</u></b>, adj. Impotent.</span><span =
-style=3D'font-size:18.0pt;
-color:navy'> <br>
- <br>
-</span><span style=3D'font-size:18.0pt;color:black'>6.<b><u> =
-Negligent</u></b>,
-adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a =
-nightgown.<br>
-<br>
-7.<b><u> Lymph</u></b>, v. To walk with a lisp.<br>
-<br>
-8.<b><u> Gargoyle</u></b>, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.<br>
-<br>
-9.<b><u> Flatulence</u></b>, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone =
-who has
-been run over by a steamroller.<br>
-<br>
-10.<b><u> Balderdash</u></b>, n. A rapidly receding hairline.<br>
-<br>
-11.<b><u> Testicle</u></b>, n.. A humorous question on an exam.<br>
-<br>
-12.<b><u> Rectitude</u></b>, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by
-proctologists.<br>
-<br>
-13.<b><u> Pokemon</u></b>, n.. A Rastafarian proctologist.<br>
-<br>
-14.<b><u> Oyster</u></b>, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation =
-with
-Yiddishisms.<br>
-<br>
-15.<b><u> Frisbeetarianism</u></b>, n. The belief that, after death, the =
-soul
-flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.<br>
-<br>
-16.<b><u> Circumvent</u></b>, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts =
-worn
-by Jewish men.</span><o:p></o:p></p>
-
-<p class=3DMsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p>
-
-<p class=3DMsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p>
-
-</div>
-
-</body>
-
-</html>
-
-------=_NextPart_000_0011_01CAEB0F.13010070--
-
-
-
-------=_NextPart_000_000C_01CAEB0F.12D842C0
-Content-Type: text/plain;
-> charset="us-ascii"
-Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit
-
-
-1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
-financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
-
-2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
-
-3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
-realize it was your money to start with.
->
-4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
-
-5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
-ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
-of breaking down in the near future.
-
-6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting
-laid.
-
-7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high
-
-8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
-doesn't get it.
-
-9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
-
-10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
-
-11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really
-bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a
-serious bummer.
-
-12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming
-only things that are good for you.
-
-13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
-
-14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
-come at you rapidly.
-
-15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n..): The frantic dance performed just after you've
-accidentally walked through a spider web.
-
-16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your
-bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
-
-17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the
-fruit you're eating.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-------=_NextPart_000_000C_01CAEB0F.12D842C0
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-> charset="us-ascii"
-Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
-
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-
-<head>
-<meta http-equiv=3DContent-Type content=3D"text/html; =
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-<meta name=3DGenerator content=3D"Microsoft Word 12 (filtered medium)">
-<style>
-<!--
-/* Font Definitions */
-@font-face
-> {font-family:"Cambria Math";
-> panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;}
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-> {font-family:Calibri;
-> panose-1:2 15 5 2 2 2 4 3 2 4;}
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-> panose-1:2 14 7 5 2 2 6 2 4 4;}
-@font-face
-> {font-family:Tahoma;
-> panose-1:2 11 6 4 3 5 4 4 2 4;}
-/* Style Definitions */
-p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
-> {margin:0in;
-> margin-bottom:.0001pt;
-> font-size:14.0pt;
-> font-family:"Verdana","sans-serif";}
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-> mso-style-link:"Heading 1 Char";
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-> font-weight:normal;
-> font-style:normal;
-> text-decoration:none none;}
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-> {mso-style-name:"Balloon Text Char";
-> mso-style-priority:99;
-> mso-style-link:"Balloon Text";
-> font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif";}
-.MsoChpDefault
-> {mso-style-type:export-only;}
-@page Section1
-> {size:8.5in 11.0in;
-> margin:1.0in 1.0in 1.0in 1.0in;}
-div.Section1
-> {page:Section1;}
--->
-</style>
-<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
-<o:shapedefaults v:ext=3D"edit" spidmax=3D"1026" />
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-</head>
-
-<body lang=3DEN-US link=3D"#410082" vlink=3D"#932968">
-
-<div class=3DSection1>
-
-<p class=3DMsoNormal><span style=3D'font-size:18.0pt;color:black'><br>
-1.<b><u> Cas<i>h</i>tration</u></b> (n.): The act of buying a house, =
-which
-renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of =
-time.<br>
-<br>
-2.<b><u> Ignora<i>n</i>us</u></b>: A person who's both stupid and an =
-asshole.<br>
-<br>
-3.<b><u> Int<i>a</i>xication</u></b>: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, =
-which
-lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.<br>
- <br>
-4.<b><u> Rein<i>t</i>arnation</u></b>: Coming back to life as a =
-hillbilly.<br>
-<br>
-5.<b><u> <i>B</i>ozone</u></b> (n.): The substance surrounding stupid =
-people
-that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, =
-unfortunately,
-shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.<br>
-<br>
-6.<b><u> Forepl<i>o</i>y</u></b>: Any misrepresentation about yourself =
-for the
-purpose of getting laid.<br>
-<br>
-7.<b><u> G<i>i</i>raffiti</u></b>: Vandalism spray-painted very, very =
-high<br>
-<br>
-8.<b><u> Sarc<i>h</i>asm</u></b>: The gulf between the author of =
-sarcastic wit
-and the person who doesn't get it.<br>
-<br>
-9.<b><u> Inoculat<i>t</i>e</u></b>: To take coffee intravenously when =
-you are
-running late.<br>
-<br>
-10.<b><u> Osteopor<i>n</i>osis</u></b>: A degenerate disease. (This one =
-got
-extra credit.)<br>
-<br>
-11.<b><u> <i>K</i>armageddon</u></b>: It's like, when everybody is =
-sending off
-all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth =
-explodes and
-it's like, a serious bummer.<br>
-<br>
-12.<b><u> Deca<i>f</i>alon</u></b> (n.): The grueling event of getting =
-through
-the day consuming only things that are good for you.<br>
-<br>
-13.<b><u> <i>G</i>libido</u></b>: All talk and no action.<br>
-<br>
-14.<b><u> Dop<i>e</i>ler Effect</u></b>: The tendency of stupid ideas to =
-seem
-smarter when they come at you rapidly.<br>
-<br>
-15.<b><u> Arachnoleptic Fit</u></b> (n..): The frantic dance performed =
-just
-after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.<br>
-<br>
-16.<b><u> Beelzebug</u></b> (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that =
-gets into
-your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.<br>
-<br>
-17.<b><u> Caterp<i>a</i>llor</u></b> (n.): The color you turn after =
-finding
-half a worm in the fruit you're eating.<br>
-<br>
-</span><o:p></o:p></p>
-
-<p class=3DMsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p>
-
-<p class=3DMsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p>
-
-</div>
-
-</body>
-
-</html>
-
-------=_NextPart_000_000C_01CAEB0F.12D842C0--
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