[Sks-devel] Re: Dump

[Robert J. Hansen]

On 10/14/10 12:42 PM, R P Herrold wrote:
> Review the bidding.  I rather believe you initiated the uncivil tone,
> and I have been mild in reply:
> 
> Hansen:
>> herrold:
>>> and [impairing] the privacy of a whole community's members
>> This is nonsense.
> 
> and an EOM.  I think that qualifies as rude.

That qualifies as direct.  If I had called you names, questioned your
commitment, heaped aspersions on your personal character, etcetera, that
would be ad-hominem and beyond the pale.

Your *ideas*, though, are fair game.  As they should be, as they must
be.  You are not your ideas.  In my daily work, probably ninety percent
of my promising ideas ultimately turn out to be crap.  When one of my
co-workers listens to me pitch an idea, gives it fair consideration, and
then says, "Rob, it's crap," I thank him for his time.  He's given me
everything I could ask for: not only his consideration, but also his
*judgment*.  He has given me his professional opinion in a clear and
unambiguous manner.  I can choose to abandon my research project or I
can choose to continue it.  Maybe it will pan out and maybe it won't.
But I will never be able to claim my colleagues did not give me the
benefit of their clearest, most direct judgment.

I have had co-workers who think that "you're stupid" is a good
criticism.  I'm glad to no longer work with them.  But I am genuinely
grateful for my co-workers who have listened fairly and then told me,
"Rob, this is nonsense."

If you really think that criticism of your ideas and proposals -- even
harsh and blunt criticism -- rises to the level of a personal attack
against you, well... I don't know what to say about that, besides that I
have no desire to speak with you further.