Hello :o) |
check this funny story out hehehe
Notes From an Inexperienced Curry Taster Named FRANK, who was
(A very Indian suburb of Durban, South Africa).
"Recently I was honored to be selected as a judge at a curry
original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened
standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the
beer wagon when
the call came. I was assured by the other two judges (couple of
Indians) that the curry wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides,
me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted."
Here are the scorecards from the event:
Curry # 1: Manoj's Maniac Mobster Monster Curry
JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
FRANK: Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove
from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I
the worst one. These charo's are crazy.
Curry # 2: Applesamy's Afterburner Curryr Curry
JUDGE ONE: Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tangs.
JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken
FRANK: Keep this out of reach of children I'm not sure what I
to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted
to give me
the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they
saw the look
on my face.
Curry # 3: Farouk's Famous Burn Down the Barn curry
JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse curry Great kick. Need more
JUDGE TWO: A beanless curry, a bit salty, good use of red
FRANK: Call Colesburg, I've located a uranium spill. My nose
feels like I
have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now, get
beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my
backbone is in
the front part of my chest. I'm getting shit-faced from all the
Curry # 4: Barbu's Black Magic
JUDGE ONE: Black bean curry with almost no spice. Disappointing.
JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for
fish or other
mild foods, not much of a curry.
FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was
unable to taste
it, is it possible to burn out taste buds? Savathree, the
standing behind me fresh refills; that 300 lbs. bitch is
starting to look
HOT, just like this nuclear waste I'm eating. Is curry an
Curry # 5: Laveshnee's Legal Lip Remover
JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong curry. Cayenne peppers freshly ground,
considerable kick. Very impressive.
JUDGE TWO: Curry using shredded beef; could use more tomato.
Must admit the
cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
FRANK: My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead,
and I can no
longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed
The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her curry
had given me
brain damage. Savathree saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring
directly on it from a pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips
really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop
Curry # 6: Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety curry. Good balance
of spice and
JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and
FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with
flames. I shit myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat
chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut
she must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore.
I need to
wipe my ass with a snow cone.
Curry # 7: Sugash's Screaming Sensation Curry
JUDGE ONE: A mediocre curry with too much reliance on canned
JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a
can of curry
peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried
Number 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing
FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I
feel damn thing. I've lost the sight in one eye, and the world
it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with curry that
unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like shit
to match my
damn shirt. At least during the autopsy they'll know what killed
decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it, I'm not
oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the
in my stomach.
Curry # 8: Hansraj's Mount Saint Curry
JUDGE ONE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend curry, safe
for all not
too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced curry, neither
hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3
fell over and pulled the curry pot down on top of himself. Not
sure if he's
going to make it. Poor Yank, wonder how he'd had reacted to a
FRANK: (editor's note: Judge #3 was unable to report)